Nervous, but God pushed me forward

I prayed first. That's what they said to do. I knew it was the only way that I'd have the nerve. So, I ran and I prayed. Then I prayed again. Then...I went.

I asked Him to send me and He did. I was one in a sea of hundreds. Nervous. But determined.

Water helped to calm my nerves. Lots happened. People moved. I smiled. Said hi. Tried to seem normal.

Then there was one. She stood out to me in the crowd. I approached, calm and timid, excited and anxious.

A few minutes later, I had a new friend. Who knows what will happen, or if I'm wrong. Either way: I'm excited about what He has in store for me.

Trying to see past how I feel

Today I was inspired.

I've only been awake about an hour and nothing new or different has happened in that time, but I feel compelled to share after reading what Lara had to say about peace.

Yesterday, I woke up after only sleeping for three hours and went to work. I didn't have to walk to the bus because I carpool with a good friend, but I spent the whole 20 minutes in the car talking about why I hadn't slept.

My emotional exhaustion exuded from me. I was, and regrettably am, discontent.

Not with every part of my life, but the parts that upset me have the greatest control over my emotional health. I cry out to God because He is the only One who can make it better. I pray and when I can't find the words I journal. Writing, I have more time to think about what I want to say and I cry out to my Lord in a letter. I ask Him to take it from me and control my life.

Today, things aren't much different, except that my desire for contentment is finally beginning to overpower all the emotional mess. My strive to live for my Lord is greater than the situations in my life that fight for control over me. I will remember to always be content in everything, because He will work out His perfect plan for my life.

Do not be anxious about anything,

but in every situation, by prayer and petition,

with Thanksgiving,

present your requests to the Lord.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,

will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-8

WESTERN!!!

And the pick goes to...JAQUINN...for WESTERN GUILFORD HIGH SCHOOL!!

And the crowd goes wild!!! (crowd roaring. throwing tinsel).

Tonight I was placed at my high school for Young Life. I am officially the newest Young Life leader at Western Guildford High School. I have officially joined a community of Jesus freaks who are sharing their love for the Lord by building relationships with teenagers. I'm SO EXCITED!!!

Here it is!!

It's official, because I got my first YL t-shirt! The front says Western; the back says Johnson.

What does all this mean? It means that God has put me where He wants me to be and I have the opportunity to follow His path for me by sharing my life with others. All the setbacks and hiccups and scary moments that I am going to encounter with this path will be worth it. God didn't say it would be easy, but He is leading my path now. No other way for it to go.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”

And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” 

Isaiah 6:8

1:49 am

It's 1:49 am. I woke up about an hour ago, thanks to the great decision to sleep on my sofa at 6:30 pm.

Let's talk about the excitement that comes along with this time in the morning. So far I have watched You've Got Mail - again. I never get sick of that movie. I've eaten some Honey Nut Cheerios, posted in my classroom, and talked to my honey on Facebook.

What now? Short of getting up and cleaning or something (which is not going to happen) I am stuck. Stuck awake in the middle of the night when the rest of the world is sleeping or doing something they shouldn't.  It's a good time to think about how blessed I am in the fact that I have the luxury of sleeping and being awake. Being awake means that I'm still alive! Being awake means that God is still breathing life into me and I am able to talk to people and eat and function. I am still free!

Oh...being awake in the middle of the night could be a bad thing, but I've decided that it's just a reminder of God's goodness. My life - His love. His love - my joy, peace, and happiness. Suddenly, being awake at 1:56 am doesn't seem like such a bad thing.